Today at IzzyMom I’m discussing whether adults should try to force kids to be more group-oriented or whether it’s better to leave kids to their “best friend” relationships. As the mom of an almost 10 yr old, this is a very relevant topic in my life right now. What say you, brilliant and attractive reader? Drop by and share your thoughts.

When people SHOW YOU who they are, believe them —Maya Angelou

Those are words to live by, folks.

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If you ever wondered what really goes on inside my pretty little head, read my post over at IzzyMom.

It’s one I wrote about a year ago that was  well-received by readers but for some reason, had been unpublished. I have no idea why.

Today I got the coolest email from someone who had read that post and bookmarked it, only to find that it was no longer there. She inquired about it and asked if it was still available.

She paid me/my post some compliments that made me feel so good and I was so happy that something I had written had resonated to the degree that someone would ask about it in it’s absence.

I found the post in question. I read it.  It still felt real and true. I could still relate to it.

And suddenly I was inspired. I don’t want to just dump my disjointed thoughts into a text editor. I want to write again. Whether I will, I don’t know, but at least the flesh is willing…

I republished this post for Sarah and for me. And it was like coming home.

Did I ever tell you that my name used to be Erica?

Yes, for three days that was my identity…Baby Girl Erica H.

Before I was adopted.

Sometimes I think of changing my name back to Erica. I’ve always liked it.

Of course, nobody would understand and I would get tired of explaining myself…

Identity is important, though. To me.

Female, adoptee, daughter, wife, lover, fighter, mother, friend, woman, designer, writer, human being…

It happens much too easily.  I become attached and then it scares me because I really don’t want to be attached to anyone or anything.

The only people worth being attached to are the ones who will fight for you and not let you go no matter how hard you try. The tricky part is figuring out who those people are before they disappoint you or hurt you or pull away first.

The unfortunate truth is that attachment is a part of human nature. We all want it and we all need it, even when we fight against it.

Driving many quiet hours in the dark last night,  I accidentally figured out why I can’t let this blog go…

The Caffeinatrix is what you might call my…alter ego. Letting her go would be like letting a part of myself go and I’m not ready for her to die.

I have a tendency to compartmentalize various parts of myself, as illustrated by my many blogs. Each one represents a fraction of who I am. I’m not sure if this is incredibly unhealthy or terribly brilliant.

But alas, it’s a new year and time for more self-reflection (and the requisite navelgazing). Maybe this will be the year that I…

Hello, old friend…. You’re looking lovely and rather fit, too, I might add. Have you been working out?

Wow…I haven’t posted on this blog in ages. Now that nobody comes here anymore, I’m oddly excited to be doing this.

It’s good to be back but don’t expect much from me. In the end, I’ll just disappoint you with my flakiness and flightiness and my tendency to become bored with things after nanosecond or ten.

Anyhoo…it’s Christmas eve. I have shit to do.

Have a merry one :)

I’m still hangin’ over at IzzyMom :)

Last Sunday on Mother’s Day, I awoke around noon and was greeted with a fantastic breakfast (that means BACON), fresh coffee, gorgeous pink Gerber daisies (my favorite) and the sweetest little treasures from my children.

Accompanying the gifts from my daughter was a card/drawing she made at school that touched my heart—but also made me scratch my head a bit (see highlighted parts).

It read:

I love my mommy sooooo much! Her name is Janet. She is fun and pretty. We like to go to the mall and buy clothing together. It’s fun! Sometimes she plays board games with me. My mommy is a great cook, too. My favorite meal she makes is tater tot casserole. My mom makes dinner, does laundry and cleans the house. I’m glad she takes good care of me.

Is that not the sweetest thing you’ve ever read? I know. It is.

The only thing I don’t understand why she makes me sound like a housewifey mall rat who favors food from the Michelle Duggar cookbook of white trashy recipes?

Allow me to elaborate…

We never go clothes shopping at the mall. Well, actually, I did recently take the kids with me when I went hunting for a purple shirt to wear for the March for Babies but seriously, before that, I can’t remember the last time I dared to take the kids clothes shopping with me. I’M NO MASOCHIST!

Also? I DID a made tater tot casserole — ONCE — but only because I happened to have all the ingredients and I really REALLY didn’t want to make burgers or meatloaf again. It was okay but nobody seemed all that jazzed about it. Yes, I noted the recipe while watching “18 Kids and Counting”  but hello? Tater Tot casserole? That’s just embarrassing and frankly not the sort of thing I’d want the whole world to know about — not including YOU , of course — because I trust that we will never speak of this again. RIGHT???

It was really very generous of my daughter to say I’m a great cook but just like that business about cleaning and doing laundry? It’s kind of not accurate. I’m a bad cook and I really try NOT to clean or do laundry. Must be wishful thinking on her part… Poor kid.

Don’t get me wrong. I thought T’s card was beyond awesome. She said all those nice things (factual errors aside), which I loved—but you have to admit…it’s comedy gold.

Now that part about being fun and pretty?  TOTALLY TRUE :)

This is funny as hell… If you like Andy Samberg and Seth Rogen, you’ll love it. If you think Andy Samberg and Seth Rogen are the most annoying people on the planet, well, you STILL might like it but in the unlikely event that you hate it, don’t blame me. I just work here.

I force my children to watch Mystery Diagnosis with me every day. Okay…I don’t FORCE them, as in tying them up and propping their eyelids open with toothpicks, but I turn it on and if they don’t want to watch it? Too bad because Mystery Diagnosis is the most awesomely awesome show on TV (aside from Gossip Girl and Trust Me—which is awesome because it’s awesome and also because Tom Cavanagh, whom I used to regard as somewhat lizardy looking, is totally cute)

I hate, hate, HATE the term “make love” as well as any variation of it.  It just sounds so…gross. Does that make me weird? Maybe it does as I think I’m also the only woman on the planet who does NOT get all squiggedy over the word “panties.”

Panties, panties, panties! Take off your PANTIES!

Hah! Not a single shudder.

But that other one… YICKETY YICK YICK YICK.

There’s only one exception to the never say ‘make love’ in my presence rule and it’s this song.

I’m craving a gyro. I haven’t had one in years. Meat on a spool=NOMS

And finally, there’s only one more episode until I’m all caught up with Doctor Who. Am sad. But for the love of all things good and decent, do NOT tell me what happens. Also? Harboring a teeny an unspeakably  huge crush on David Tennant.

That is all.

Well,  hello there!

I’ve been engaged in a mad sleep-a-thon. A sleep-off, if you will. And guess what? I WIN. Because I have undoubtedly slept more in the past three days than ANY of you. And that’s why I feel ALIVE! This sleeping business… It really is something to marvel at because when you get enough of it? You feel SO. MUCH. BETTER.

You see, without going into too much detail, I’ve been dealing with an issue that has turned my whole life upside down and this issue, which is not completely resolved as of yet, has stressed me out to the nth degree and apparently, my body and mind revolted and decided I should sleep. And sleep I did. And I feel trés awesome today. HAPPY EVEN!

But? I’m camping with Brownies this weekend and I’m feeling very apprehensive about that. I don’t know why, though. Even last year, when I had both my period AND a raging sinus infection, I still had fun. Well, minus the snoring…

Someone snored like a freight train. I didn’t sleep a wink and my daughter cried because she couldn’t sleep either. So there we are, whispering in the dark about the snoring while she cries and I debate setting my ears on fire. That part wasn’t fun.

Soooo…I went online today and bought some earplugs made especially to block out snoring—a pair for my daughter and a pair for myself. All I can say is they better work because I paid a small fortune to make sure they’re here before we leave on Friday.

And if they don’t…the person with the pillow over their face?  Won’t be waking up the next morning.

I’m not a huge fan of the vegetables. Actually, let me rephrase that… I’m not a huge fan of cooking the vegetables.

Or buying them.

I don’t know how to tell a good *insert random vegetable name* from a bad one or an overripe one from an overpriced one—actually, vegetables seem to be quite a bargain to me and I’m perplexed when I hear people bitching about the price of peppers or avocados or whatever.

Anyway, to reiterate, I don’t hate vegetables. I just really like them a WHOLE lot better when someone else buys them (because they probably KNOW how to NOT buy bad veggies) and even more so, I like when SOMEONE ELSE cooks them.

Me? I typically mutilate them first and then proceed to undercook, overcook or underseason them and generally render the poor vegetables inedible—unless they come in a bag, drowning with processed cheese sauce in which case, they’re kind of already inedible by most standards..

Also, I must confess…I am of the mind that just about everything in life worth eating can be improved with a little hot oil and a skillet. Potatoes? They’re good. Crispy hash browns, however, are heavenly.

Salmon? It’s okay. Salmon in a crusty, crunchy pan-fried little croquette thingy? Nomnom-a-licious.

Toasted cheese sandwich? Meh. Grilled cheese sandwich? Far superior in every way.

As luck should have it,  today, while perusing my iGoogle page and reading news (an excellent procrastination tool, if I do say) I came across a recipe for veggie pancakes on NPR. Naturally, this appeals to me per my unbridled love for all things crispy, crunchy and savory and I really want to try to make them but I’m reticent…

First, I’ll have to buy all the vegetables, which we’ve already established is a challenge for me; then I’ll have to cut them, grate them—whatever—without losing a digit (or any precious knuckleskin) and of course, try not to burn them which, in case I didn’t mention, is always hard because I am an impatient cook who frequently jacks up the heat “just for a second” and then wanders away to screw off on Twitter or read email or check out the news on iGoogle. The ceremonial ringing of the smoke alarm usually ensues.

Urggghhh. Maybe next week…

When your husband’s doctor’s office calls and says they need to speak to him about the labs from his recent physical at his earliest convenience. Well, he’s out of town and didn’t put me on his forms as a person they can discuss his medical stuff with so now I’m sitting here wondering WTH is up and no idea when I’ll know.